Men at Midlife—and Beyond

Wednesday, 20 November 2019 12:15 Written by

Wellington Group President Dr. David Rakofsky specializes in helping men journey through the challenging years of midlife and beyond. He has a great deal of experience in this area and here he shares his approach.

Do you remember when Michael Jordan left the Bulls? You can imagine how difficult it was for him to define himself after so many years in the spotlight with a singular focus. And you can bet a professional helped Michael Jordan figure out his second act. In my practice, I see successful men who are reaching for something new in their lives.

My job is to help you decide how and when to make a move—professionally or personally. I know that when you’re at the top of your game in your career—or on your way to the top—you don’t want to make a mistake by throwing anything away. You’ve worked hard on your career, your position, your practice, your company, your reputation. But you also know something in you is ready for a change. You may not be burned out—yet but you’re not excited anymore, you’re not as productive as you used to be, and you feel tired. The emotional payback isn’t there. You may know you are open to something new, but not know what that “something new” is.

You might imagine that seeing a therapist would be too touchy-feely, or make you feel flawed or have a mental illness. But that isn’t how I see it, and the men I’ve worked with, men who have stood where you are standing today, agree. I offer you the opportunity to change so you can realize your full potential. It can be difficult to discuss how you are feeling with your colleagues, even your friends and family, because you don’t want to change their perception of you and all that you’ve built. And I know you want to keep your life moving forward while you figure things out.

You may also have personal concerns on your mind: You might be looking for more friends and deeper connections; you and your wife or partner might have grown apart or be in conflict. Maybe one of your children isn’t talking to you. Maybe you’ve never married or never had children. I’ve often found that what seems like a professional crossroads actually involves relationships with other people.

That’s where I come in. Figuring out how to get from here to there—or just where “there” is—is something I specialize in. For men at retirement, it’s about a second act. For men in the thick of their careers, it’s about meaning and fulfillment. I can help you understand and realize you want something that speaks to you more deeply and how to set and achieve new goals.

I work discretely. We’ll have conversations. You’ll be amazed how much we can figure out together in these conversations, and how much you can grow as a result. I’ll help you figure out how you want to approach each area of your life and help you make the changes you are seeking.